The Love Life Thread

[Leorgathar]

For some reason I missed saying it on Facebook. So congratulations for your marriage. Here's wishing you the brightest future

I bet Cancun was awesome (please tell me you went to Xcaret, if not, do yourself a favor and go back to Cancun to check it out )

[Sharifu]

Congrats on your marriage Simba 04. It seems just like yesterday to me that you mentioned on Lea that you just started dating Cristina after you asked her dad... Gosh time flies.

[Azerane]

I'm really excited for your 04, congratulations to you both. It's been lovely getting to follow your relationship even if only virtually on here and through facebook. So glad you had a wonderful wedding and honeymoon

[King Simba]

Many congratulations on your marriage, '04. I really hope you have a wonderful marriage together. I saw the picture of you both at Chichen Itza. It's such an awesome place.

[Jazzy B Bunny]

Hey, I know this is an old post...but positive thoughts! It will happen just don't keep thinking about it and it will happen when you least expect it, just enjoy life. I've been single for about 3 years now and I'm not lying when I say it's been the best 3 years ever. I spent my 'teens' always wanting a boyfriend, but now I am in no rush to meet anyone and I'm enjoying life for what it is, if I meet someone then great.. If not who cares!


(Maybe he's waiting to take you to Florida)

*sigh*
If anyone else I know is getting engaged, I swear, I'm gonna drop dead

I'm happy for those, don't get me wrong.
But knowing it's something I always dreamed of, which isn't gonna happen to me ever, just hurts.

On the good side, his mom finally got a little smarter, and last Saturday, when he was working over at her place, she told him, that he should go home, and have dinner with me, that it wasn't all that fair, to leave me home alone all day untill 10pm or so, and that I'd have to eat alone.

He got home, he told me she said that, and I'm like: what did you say before she said that ???
Apperently she said that all on her own.
Couldn't believe it o_O

[nathalie]

That's really sweet

But he's not coming to Florida haha, he'd rather die I guess, lol.
He's not so much into Disney ... he's only going now next month with me, because when we went last June, things weren't all so great that day. My sister was a pain, my parents kind of didn't want to go anymore, things like that.

So he just wants go to this time with me, and have fun, just the two of us.
We'll see if he still likes it after that or not, lol.

Anyways, he doesn't want to get married.
He doesn't wanna get married, unless you get kids afterwoods. He thinks it's wrong, that if you get married and not have kids, because to him, that's not the "normal way".
And I don't want kids.
I wanna marry him because I love him, that's how I believe in those things.
I do not believe a baby makes you love each other more.

I'd have to sacrafice my life for a baby, and I don't want that.
I'm a very selfish person, though, whenever someone needs my help, I'm there, but that's very different in my own mind.
It's hard to explain how I feel about that ...

My Godchild was home last week for 2 days, he's 1,5 years old. And my dad is all like: there's your auntie ...
And I'm like: leave me alone ...


(edit)
Though, I think he's changed since his parents got divorced 2 years ago.
He was already 28 at the time, and thought his parents would stay together forever. I guess because of the age, he realized a lot more what was going on and why then when you're like 8 years old, and I do see a change in thoughts with him since then.
I guess he's scared, which is understandable.
And also, after his mom left, he learned that his mom was pregnant of him and they "had" to get married, so my guess that all those things made him change a lot of things in his mind.
He was extremely upset when he found out his mom was already pregnant before they got married, 'cause even though that wasn't something he could do about, he still felt guilty, because it was "him" she was pregnant of.

[Simbaspirit]

congrats Simba! That's so awesome

[Jazzy B Bunny]

I'm the same when it comes to kids. I don't want any, at least not for a good 10 years I'd much rather have a dog.
I was with my ex for 2 years and I'm not actually sure what attracted me to him. He was boring, too sensible (ha) and very controlling. I couldn't dye my hair or get a tattoo, it all ended one day with him saying 'your not who I want you to be'.... it took me literally a day to get over it and I've not seen him since. I don't want to feel trapped like that again.
Hell, he was scared of everything wouldn't get on a plane or a ferry... Freaked out at Navy Days because he didn't want to go on a ship. The stories are endless.

That's really sweet

But he's not coming to Florida haha, he'd rather die I guess, lol.
He's not so much into Disney ... he's only going now next month with me, because when we went last June, things weren't all so great that day. My sister was a pain, my parents kind of didn't want to go anymore, things like that.

So he just wants go to this time with me, and have fun, just the two of us.
We'll see if he still likes it after that or not, lol.

Anyways, he doesn't want to get married.
He doesn't wanna get married, unless you get kids afterwoods. He thinks it's wrong, that if you get married and not have kids, because to him, that's not the "normal way".
And I don't want kids.
I wanna marry him because I love him, that's how I believe in those things.
I do not believe a baby makes you love each other more.

I'd have to sacrafice my life for a baby, and I don't want that.
I'm a very selfish person, though, whenever someone needs my help, I'm there, but that's very different in my own mind.
It's hard to explain how I feel about that ...

My Godchild was home last week for 2 days, he's 1,5 years old. And my dad is all like: there's your auntie ...
And I'm like: leave me alone ...


(edit)
Though, I think he's changed since his parents got divorced 2 years ago.
He was already 28 at the time, and thought his parents would stay together forever. I guess because of the age, he realized a lot more what was going on and why then when you're like 8 years old, and I do see a change in thoughts with him since then.
I guess he's scared, which is understandable.
And also, after his mom left, he learned that his mom was pregnant of him and they "had" to get married, so my guess that all those things made him change a lot of things in his mind.
He was extremely upset when he found out his mom was already pregnant before they got married, 'cause even though that wasn't something he could do about, he still felt guilty, because it was "him" she was pregnant of.

[nathalie]

Well, I haven't been on a plane eather yet haha

My first one was 5,5 years.
I'm very glad I got rid of him, though, it's been since 2007 and just a few nights ago, I dreamed about him, again.
Well, they aren't dreams, to me they are nightmares. Apperently there's something I'm not over with yet.

The 2nd one was about 1,5 years, and he told me certain things I couldn't do anymore.
Like I listened.
I wasn't allowed on msn, because God forbid I'd be talking to another guy ... guys who I knew years before I met him.
I didn't listen, I did my own thing, no one is telling me not to talk to my friends, no matter if that's by phone or online.
I decided not to be his cleaning lady, so he kicked me out. That was all I was good for in the end, but in the beginning you just don't see that, off course *sigh*.

I've always said I don't want kids, also with the previous 2.
They can all ask my mom, ever since I was a little kid I've been saying I don't want it.
It doesn't do anything for me.
I don't have that mom-feeling.
Whenever my nephews are home, I don't have the urge to talk baby to them, or pick them up.
I have no patience.

Apperently when I'm 50 or 60 or so, I'm gonna regret not having kids.
I don't see why? Lol.

[Jazzy B Bunny]

Haha, your like the double of me! I've never wanted kids. Most of my friends have them and I force a smile when I have to hold them, they are just gross and they all look the same that's my opinion. They aren't so bad when they can have a conversation though.

[nathalie]

Yeah, my ex had 2 boys, they were already 6 and 7 when I met them, it was OK.
You could talk to them, they could do certain things on their own already.

My oldest nephew just turned 4, he talks back and such for a while now, which makes me feel a bit better.
So once my Godchild is 3-4 years old, it'll be better.
But unfortunetly, when you have kids of your own, you can't skip the first 5 years or so hehe.

[Jazzy B Bunny]

Oh my life, just logged on to Facebook and some guy added me so I accepted to see if I knew him. Then he sent me messages saying that I'm 'stunning' Urgh creeped out.!

[King Simba]

I haven't had any random person add me on Facebook for quite a while, but I've had randomers message me on Skype before. It gets quite annoying when there's an option to block random people messaging you but they still do anyway. It really puts me off Skype.

As for kids, I'm not really child-fied myself to be honest, but when I get my own I'm sure that'll change, hehe. That probably won't be for about 10 years though.

[LunarCat]

Oh my life, just logged on to Facebook and some guy added me so I accepted to see if I knew him. Then he sent me messages saying that I'm 'stunning' Urgh creeped out.!

This has happened to me before.

For future reference, when someone friends you on Facebook it gives you access to their profile page before you accept. If you still don't know who they are, you can also send them a message and ask. Always best to be on the safe side and double check before giving them access to your information. Also be careful because many of those are fake profiles that could lead to someone hacking your account.

[Jazzy B Bunny]

I deleted him right away.
To put it bluntly....

[KanuTGL]

Congrats on your marriage, Simba 04! I'm happy for you! ^^

I'm the same when it comes to kids. I don't want any, at least not for a good 10 years I'd much rather have a dog.

Bwahaha, I'm just the same Give me an animal over a human baby any day I feel I "get along" much better with animals; I just don't know how to act around children and it makes me very uncomfortable.

[Azerane]

Congrats on your marriage, Simba 04! I'm happy for you! ^^


Bwahaha, I'm just the same Give me an animal over a human baby any day I feel I "get along" much better with animals; I just don't know how to act around children and it makes me very uncomfortable.

I understand that completely. I'm ok around my nephew and niece, I guess because I have to be. But every now and then at work, I have to fill in for someone else and run the kids DIY workshop. Which is ok, but I'm supposed to do facepainting, I did it once, felt completely uncomfortable and have never done it since, even though I'm supposed to. I really dislike running the workshops though, I'm just not comfortable around other peoples kids unless I know them really well. It's just strange to me.

[nathalie]

I'm actually glad I'm not the only one here who feels really uncomfortable around kids.

The thing with me is though, it won't change a bit if the kid was mine.

[cleargreenwater]

No, I hold no illusions of ever finding children personally appealing and find extended interaction with them exhausting and tedious.

I can appreciate the hopefulness inherent in newborns and the people having them, and have learned to frame interacting with them accordingly, but IMO the fresh ones look like boiled monkeys and the older ones just don't hold a candle to baby animals. It's like they're so underdeveloped I actually have trouble interpreting babies as young humans until they hit the toddler stage :C At which point there's a whole other set of reasons to restrict exposure to them to small quanitities.

I was never raised or trained to handle or enjoy children, and tbh it rather annoys me when people act like it's a natural. The only thing that's truly biologically-inspired natural is to feed it and keep it alive, the rest is learned/encouraged behavior and I just never learned it.

And since that all makes me sound like a terrible person, children do have merit and I do occassionally voluntarily engage with other people's because interacting and assisting with other's children is a great way to bond with the family & friends that are their parents and be integrated into people's lives, including those children when they're grown past the dependant stage. I just have a very low tolerance threshold and do so selectively, and it requires a conscious effort.

They just aren't my cuppa.

[Azerane]

^ I think you just said it CGW, maybe that's what draws us all here to the internet, dislike for children

As much as I have no interest in having kids, I consider my Nanna's position, having her grown-up children visiting with their now grown-up children. When I'm 80, is that going to be something that I'll miss not having, or not. Haven't figured that one out yet, guess I'll just have to wait and see. Though I don't be any means think that being afraid of not having that is a good reason to have kids. I like my life the way it is now, I'll worry about the rest of it later

And back on topic, Pat and I had an engagement party yesterday. Sure we've been engaged just over a year, but having been apart for most of that and only just having gotten our own place, it felt like a good time to want to celebrate that. It actually worked out really great because my mum is just finishing up a four week break from her chemo before starting radiotherapy, so she was able to enjoy it. It was a great night though, had friends and family. We were expecting just over 30 but only 27 people ended up coming. Which I feel is a little rude to say you are attending and then not show, but not much you can do about that. I'll forgive my Uncle and Aunty who called me today to say that they're in the middle of shearing (which is a crazy business at the best of times) and they got the day mixed up with today. Still, it was so nice to have that support from friends and family. Makes me hopeful for the future.