Community Advice Thread

That is the kind of attitude I fire people for. Nobody HAS to sacrifice their days off, but as a supervisor, I want the kind of employee that takes pride in what they do, not the kind that work for the sake of satisfying their parents and looking good for their girlfreinds. People like that do nothing but hold down the business and make things difficult for everybody else. I want dedicated and loyal employees who won't hesitate to help out when needed. I want employees who wnat to work their way to the top of the chain, not ones who are going to skip out when they get board of the job. I want employees who are willing to sacrifice days off when we suddenly find ourselves short on staff for unexpected reason, not one who will make up excuses to avoid extra hours. If someone wants to say no to me, that's fine. I will find someone else, or pick up the shift myself if I need to. However, the person who continually covers for others when they are unable to work will be promoted and raised much quicker then the one who doesn't.

Tikerri, if you dislike your job enough to call it a 'hell hole", then you ned to get out of their. Find somthing that suits you better.

Thanks for the lecture; however, I still don't think a person is obligated to fill in for another; it's their job to do their job when they're scheduled, not when the boss calls them at home and says it's time to come into work. I do my job for the money, and I do it damn well, but not because I like being there. I don't like hearing a bunch of hicks with airguns call me a "Fag", "Idiot", or "Jerk" all day, lie to me, and treat me like crap. I don't like coming home covered in bruises every single day, I don't like arguing with the enraged mother because her kid got kicked out, I don't like that people ask me if they should go through with their upcoming marriage, I don't like that people get violent with me on a regular basis, I don't like having to direct the safety of hundreds or even thousands of people at a time, and I don't like going 12-14 hours without a lunch break sometimes; I do it because it pays well, both the job itself and the tips I get from private groups. When I come in to work outside of my schedule, I do so because I care about my boss and I have his back, I have no responsibility to CO Paintball Inc. to be there when it's not on my schedule.


Edit: Now, if there's a matter of a very annoying instance where my boss calls with short notice and needs me, such as giving up my Thanksgiving Day to go ref a special private group, I'm gonna ask for just compensation. To me, that would mean being allowed to cook a bass I catch in the company's pond and him giving me some extra gas money to get to the park, as well as my normal pay. He usually doesn't have a problem with that, so it all works out, but it's actually more of a matter of respect than me wanting to cook a bass. Regardless, I still feel no obligation to the company, and if I'm not scheduled to work and I don't want to, I'm going to say no.

Woah Roq, calm down son. You're missing my point entirely. I DO do overtime, I do loads and loads of extra hours (purely for the money obviously) and I offer to do it too, so you can't say I'm a slacker, because I'm only contracted to 20 hours a week, yet most of the time I do closer to 40.

But anyway, that is NOT my argument. My argument is the rude and inconsiderate way that I was asked, by way of phoning me when I was at home, I have contracted hours, I'm not on call. That is why I'm annoyed, if he'd have asked me at work, I'd have still said no, but because I do other things at the weekends, and I wouldn't have been so annoyed because I was there at the time and he could've asked me then, he saw me often enough. Yet he chose to phone my house at 9pm to ask me, and that just annoyed me, just because he doesn't have a life outside work it doesn't mean I don't either.

And yes, I'm getting out of there as soon as I find somewhere else.

I'm not going to even TRY to debate your job, Pnt. :lol: Being a Paintball referee is a whole nother ball park then a resturaunt employee. I have no idea how things work there.

However, Dani told me that his business is a clothes retailer, not much different. Dani, the reason your boss called you at home is because it was a last minute thing even for him. He didn't know he would be short staffed untill minutes minutes before yohe called you, I'm sure. I'm pretty cetrtain being rude wasn't his intention. It's pretty sad that your boss thinks so lowly of an employee working twice their weekly time. Yeah, you definatly need to get out. And again, there was nothing wrong with saing no. We all need R&R. If you work as much as you say you do, then you have nothing to worry about.

BYW, I am perfectly calm. Sorry if I seemed excited. ;)

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Originally posted by Roquivo
Dani, the reason your boss called you at home is because it was a last minute thing even for him. He didn't know he would be short staffed untill minutes minutes before yohe called you, I'm sure.

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Just one thing though, my supervisor doesn't work weekends either ;) he's weekday like me. There are different staff assigned to different days. And at the store I work at, the supervisors aren't in charge, the Management are. So what will've happened most likely, is that Piotr (my supervisor) will have been given some extra hours to give to normal staff from the management, and it makes him look good if he can get rid of them all. And he probably just realised on his way home that he still had the hours left, so he just rang round seeing if there were any takers. Woe betide any supervisor who can't get rid of overtime hours! So yeah...

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Originally posted by pntbll248
I have to disagree, I don't think you have any responsibility to that company outside of the hours you're scheduled to work. My boss tries to pull that crap with me all the time, and with as much as I care about him, I'll tell him that I'm scheduled when I'm scheduled. Now, if it's a matter of 600 people showing up on a minimum staff day, I'll come in as a personal favor, not because it's my responsibility. I'd be a bit annoyed, personally, because you have a life outside of that career, and you shouldn't be waiting for every beckoned call of your employer. Unless that's in your contract, or job description, such as a doctor, EMT, firefighter, etc...

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I agree, you are only obligated to work the shifts you are scheduled to. But a manager, etc has every right to request that you fill in for someone else...and he/she should respect the fact if you don't want to fill in for whatever reason. And as an EMT, Firefighter, etc...I think you are actually paid for the hours that you are on call. The way they do it here in Tucson is that someone works three days, and is on call maybe one or two days they don't work at the hospital I work at. And for this dude who was a Paramedic, he would be on call for half a month, and off the other half.

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That is the kind of attitude I fire people for. Nobody HAS to sacrifice their days off, but as a supervisor, I want the kind of employee that takes pride in what they do, not the kind that work for the sake of satisfying their parents and looking good for their girlfreinds. People like that do nothing but hold down the business and make things difficult for everybody else. I want dedicated and loyal employees who won't hesitate to help out when needed. I want employees who wnat to work their way to the top of the chain, not ones who are going to skip out when they get board of the job. I want employees who are willing to sacrifice days off when we suddenly find ourselves short on staff for unexpected reason, not one who will make up excuses to avoid extra hours. If someone wants to say no to me, that's fine. I will find someone else, or pick up the shift myself if I need to. However, the person who continually covers for others when they are unable to work will be promoted and raised much quicker then the one who doesn't.

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I think every manager wants employees like that...but you have to realize that people will only do so much for the little wages they may make at some of these places. I make 8 dollars an hour, so I put 8 dollars an hour worths of work in. I'll do things to help out and I will fill in shifts, but I let my manager know when I have other things I need to do with my time...8 dollars an hour isn't really worth 40 hours of my life each week...but I work because I have bills and such I need to pay.

This is awful Utora, my sympathy for you cant be done in 1 post on a forum, ill speak to you on MSN. Please Please Respond

:/

Sorry to hear that, Utora.

I can't stand my parents.....My dad regularly says he'll send me to a mental institution for 'internet addiction' and, well, that's just not right. :badnews:

I'm also sick of them judging me, yelling at me, and threatening me and all sorts of crap like that, it isn't fair to me. Oh, and once my mom said unless I started wearing makeup every morning, I would lose computer for that day.

Once my dad got so mad at me for being 'addicted' that he threw my laptop downstairs and now we have a huge hole in our wall o_0

-_-'

I don't know what to do anymore. My dad's also threatened to come to school and beat me up O_O'.

Things are kinda calm now though (this is two months later or so), but should I tell the cops anyway? I tried to call them once but before I could my mom took all the phones with her to work.

Wellllll, I kinda had a panic attack yesterday. Fun fun!

Utora...

I can't say what I want to on the forums, mostly because its not enough room, 10000 words just aint enough, I'll talk to you on MSN.. :hugs:

~KTL

I feel Very Unstable at the moment.

-Work is very hard to get where i live, i have a job but its making me exhuasted, but i need the money

-My Love for someone offline has been thrown back in my face.

-Im most likley gonna be moved 300 miles away from my friends to live in a tiny boring village in scotland in the next year, (whether i have internet acsess i dont know)

-My finacial status is Diar, and i still have to fork out ?1500 for the damage of my bike.

-My appreticeship i want to do, i need quick perssonell transport (eg, Car/Motorbike). I cant go anywhere until then

-Quite alot of my Friends, Online and Offline, are not feeling the best right now, and i feel so sorry for them and i know them so well that i feel really sad and depressed that my best friends are suffereing.

With this i think i need a break from the internet life, il proberly drop in now and then every day but proberly only for short periods of time to wait on emails and my dedication to the RP's im doing on the internet. besides that ill most likely be outside and try to sort out all the problems that have suddenly arisen in my life.

I Plead people not to be That Concerned about me, I only posted this on here because my friends and my online family have to right to know what is happening, just like offline friends and family. Things in life like this happen and they are never avoidable. Bumps are always on the path people's lifes, you just have to find the key To the Steamroller. And thats exactly what i have to do Now.

See you guys around when i can and hopefully i should be back on track in the next week or so, i should have some sense of direction by then.

I hope you can sort things out This Land, and get yourself sorted. I can't imagine how hard things must be for you at the moment as I know you've been through a lot. Stay strong. :hugs: Hope to see you back soon.

i said everything i needed to on MSN this land, you got my number, so just give me a call if you need me :)

Thanks Both of you :hugs:

'Gives everyone a big squishy huggle'

I don't know where else to go...so I'm here.
:tears:
I just don't know what to do anymore...

This is from another messageboard where I have close ties...I'd just had another fight with the parents and I lost it. :tears:

Originally posted by ________.
I got a D on my math quiz.My worst grade ever in that class..
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I replied MATH! I hate math! It has literally taken a toll on my mental health. I'm horrible at it! And not the average kind of horrible--I really do stink! I try, and try and try, and everything's hard, and I can't keep things straight. When I see new material, even after practicing it, seeing it, hearing it, reading it, it is often like Chinese!!!!!!!!

Actually, I feel like me whole stinking life is falling apart. My parents love each other, love me. I have healthy pets and I go ride. But there's a turmoil inside ME. I have so many emotional problems right now and I'm gaining weight from a bottle-of-sh&t medicine that I can't even go off of yet because it controls my EPILEPSY! Everything's falling apart! I only care about my horses and certain hobbie now!!!!!!! I feel like I've fallen and I can't get up. I've talked to a therapist, but it is hard to change, it is had to put techniques for trying to be better\happier into practice because I've been miserable since my early teens. Some days I try and some days I just don't care. I've even had thoughts of SUICIDE--but I can't tell my therapist, because she might tell my parents...and i can't tell my parents, especially my mom, because she's already worried about my epilepsy and whenever I've mentioned suicide in moments of anger she's given me crap about how it hurts God! Well, i don't believe in God anymore!! There! I said it! I don't care! I had to get it out!! I'm confused! I'm falling! I hurt.

And now I have an update: My parents had a huge fight. Over me. My dad never scolds me, he just grunts and rolls his eyes, unless I dare slam a door or yank something [faucet handle, fridgerator door, etc.] in anger...they got into a HUGE screaming match...I've never heard them fight like that before. I almost ran away from home...I got a flashlight and shoes and got to the next street before I chickened out. But I may run away in the morning, really. My mom threatened to leave, though I don't think she's serious, just mad. She says she hates homeschooling and she's sick of putting up with me. She didn't say it to my face but I heard her scream that to my dad.
Help. Somebody. Anybody.
I've fallen and I can't get up.

That doesn't sound good Kiara, I'm sorry to hear that. With the thing your mum screamed though, people can shout things out in anger and not realise what they're saying, things they don't really mean. So I hope that this was the case with your mum. If you're really, really worried about it, try talking to her, try talking to both your parents and discussing the issue with them, otherwise the tension could just build and make things worse. I don't know what else to suggest. All the best that things get sorted out though :hugs:

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Originally posted by Azerane
With the thing your mum screamed though, people can shout things out in anger and not realise what they're saying, things they don't really mean.

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This is definatly often the case in many things people scream at you. Once you get to the 'tree' stage, you just don't care and realise its all said in the heat of the moment.

*Hugs* to CotP and Utora

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Originally posted by SimbaTheLion
I also don't like travelling with inexperienced (and often young) drivers, since most of them really don't seem to know what the heck they're doing. The tests are way too easy to pass, and that's one reason why we have so many dangerous drivers on the roads.

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Wrong.

The tests are NOT easy to pass. The theory might well be easy, but the practical most certainly is not. One lapse in your concentration on one of those tests and you've blown it, That's how hard they are to pass.

And FWIW, I do know what I'm doing when I'm on the road. I may be young but I know what I'm doing since I've never caused a crash. The crash I had earlier was another person's fault which I could've done nothing to prevent (apart from being clarevoyant).

And I also think it's harsh to generalise all young drivers as "dangerous" ok, they're inexperienced, but that doesn't mean they're dangerous in the slightest.

That is all.

I agree with STL. The driving age should definatly be raised. Far too many young people are out there getting killed because of it.

(Actually, so should the drinking age, the smoking age and the age of consent be raised. People do not value their youth any more. Too many people are becoming pregnant at 11 or a little more. Its too sad and limits them too early in life. Smoking is just disgusting. Its a self-inflicted disease if you get cancer from it or worse, and you inflict the smoke on everyone around you. Drinking is harder to control unless you want police in every bar and shop, but less young people drinking means less people dying in drink-and-drive situations. End of Rant.)

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Originally posted by SimbaTheLion
The tests are easy to pass lol, bearing in mind some of the people I know who have passed them, well, it speaks for itself! It would be nice if they raised the driving age too, since most young people just like to go fast and stuff, and cause accidents. They're not safe >_< ! I think the age is being raised to 18 soon enough, but even higher would be better...

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Ever taken one? No, exactly. And I assume by that comment that you're insinuating that I'm a dumbass because I passed? I resent that, I'm not a dumbass, and that test was the most nerve-wrecking thing I've ever done.

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Originally posted by Dyani
Actually, so should the drinking age, the smoking age and the age of consent be raised. People do not value their youth any more. Too many people are becoming pregnant at 11 or a little more. Its too sad and limits them too early in life. Smoking is just disgusting. Its a self-inflicted disease if you get cancer from it or worse, and you inflict the smoke on everyone around you. Drinking is harder to control unless you want police in every bar and shop, but less young people drinking means less people dying in drink-and-drive situations. End of Rant.)

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Do you really thing raising the limits are gonna make a difference? Seriously, I started smoking at 14, and got people 16+ to buy them for me until I was 16. Same with alcohol, I started drinking at 15, and got my dad to buy my booze until I was 18. So really, if they raise the age limit, I'll just go back to what I did before, and so will almost everyone else it affects. So at the end of the day, what will raising the limits acheive? Just more law breakers.

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Originally posted by SimbaTheLion
The trouble is, people will break the law anyway, so we need harsher punishments to deter them ^_^ ...

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XD...you really have no idea do you? Nobody these days cares about punishments, they'll do it if they have to regardless of the consequences.

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Originally posted by SimbaTheLion
Oh please, I had a written driving test program on one of my old computers and I was getting 100% on it when I was like 6. Actually driving isn't bad either, my dad let me have a go hehe ^_^ !

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Computer progams ARE easy, and exactly how much driving did you do? Did you just steer or did you use the pedals too? Driving itself is easy, but passing a driving test isn't, because the people who are testing you are real nazis, they'll pull you for anything, be it not checking mirros or just being an inch too far from the curb.

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And, people do care about punishments. I know people would start caring if they started having to spend time in institutes and jail for crimes like that.

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Some and probably most people would "care" about it, but that wouldn't stop them trying it. And if they get caught, then they get caught. But as soon as they're out or whatever, they'll do it again, because they're desperate.

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It's quite sad you were smoking and drinking at that age. Your body isn't even fully developed then; it does much more harm than smoking/drinking at 18+, and even that's bad enough!

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No doubt it was and still is bad for me. But people need their methods of relaxation, and cigs and alcohol are mine.

As I said earlier, theory tests are easy. It's the actual driving test that hard.

And 15/16 is too young, I think everything should be put to 18 as the minimum age, until they're adults. 16 is too young to be giving people scooters.

Actually I love the taste of cigs, but yeah...I don't think hypnosis tapes are for me ^^

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Originally posted by Tiikeri
Do you really thing raising the limits are gonna make a difference? Seriously, I started smoking at 14, and got people 16+ to buy them for me until I was 16. Same with alcohol, I started drinking at 15, and got my dad to buy my booze until I was 18. So really, if they raise the age limit, I'll just go back to what I did before, and so will almost everyone else it affects. So at the end of the day, what will raising the limits acheive? Just more law breakers.

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I think its sad how easily people can get addicted to smoking or drinking. Those people start early and smoke for 40 years do so much damage to themselves. But I do agree. Laws do not always prevent people from breaking them. Anyway, teenagers can be more keen to break the rules than 'adults' as it is the age at which they start testing the bounderies and limits. Its is also, unfortunatly, the time where hormones kick in.

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Originally posted by Tiikeri
And 15/16 is too young, I think everything should be put to 18 as the minimum age, until they're adults. 16 is too young to be giving people scooters.

Actually I love the taste of cigs, but yeah...I don't think hypnosis tapes are for me ^^

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aah.. but people who self-inflict themselves with knives or scissors love the feel of scissors on their skin (not my experince, just a number of frineds). It is a self-inflicting disease as I said before. Although I agree that raising the age limits for sex, smoking and drinking might not have any sort of effect on young people, there should be an increased awareness and education of the consequences of what happens i.e. pregnancy, lung cancer at 45, liver damage to 26 and, consequently, death... although that is one thing no one can avoid to be fair.

As for driving tests.. I haven't got a clue about them. The theory is perhaps the easer test as it is more mental work and the liklihood of running someones cat over when you get a wrong answer is, thankfully, very low. :D
The actual driving test is the harder. But that is my opinion.

Hmm ok I kinda have a situation I need a little help with.

It's like this....

Ok so I went to school today and I was in the corridor in the morning with my friend and my ex friend called Sarah was hanging around by herself, so Sarah comes up to me calling me a name, I send one back calling her a 'sewer rat'. So she gets her two nerdy year 7 friends to back her up as Sarah assulted me of 'bullying' her when she started it with the note :grrr: .

Anyway Sarah and the year 7ns go off and come back with about three more year 7ns they come up to me and my friend asking 'why do you two bully Sarah ??'. I am very hot tempered and I push the nerdy year 7 that was moaning at me and she started nudging and clawing at me so I punched her in the face . I go off with my friend and the kid I punched was saying she would get her older sister to beat me up that has got expelled for beating people up anyway :eww:

I get sent home and I have to go to a school meeting tommorow.

So what should I do about the problem with the 'sister beating me up' ?

Ok, again, hehe, since that girl has already been expeld for beating up someone, can't the school do anything about her then?

I remember when we almost got hit by a car 3 times, we went to this schoolmeeting, and we got blamed for everything o_O

I don't really know what you could else :s
Hope things work out soon !

I would explain the situation, calmly and clearly to the people at the school meeting. Make sure you use a tone that is passive and not saying anything that shows your true opinions of the others involved. that will make you sound sensible and mature and giev you a good headstart with the people in the meeting.

Good luck hun!!!

at the end of the day. You are more in the right than in the wrong ;)

Dont be afriad, Noodle :hugs:
Everything will go fine :)#

Just follow the good advice of Dyani, because what she said is very true

It was just brought to my attention that my grandpa got alzheimers. He'd gone through a couple of tests and is now having a diagnose. I love grandpa, and I don't want to see him become an empty shell who is impossible to have a normal conversation with. This is just taking me really hard, it wasn't so long ago that he was involved in an car accident(caused by him in a way that I would rather not mention), and I know all this is hard on mom and grandma.
There has been signs on it, lately when I've talked with him I gotta talk really slow and repeat myself or else he won't get it. He can sit for hours and just stare on the TV, but when you ask him if he's seen anything good, he has no idea.
He's very absent and I don't want it to become worse, I don't want to watch him float away, but I have no choice.

I'm sorry to hear about that, Xanahti. I'll pray for him for you. Sometimes life can be hard and all you can do is watch it go by.

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Originally posted by Xanahti
It was just brought to my attention that my grandpa got alzheimers. He'd gone through a couple of tests and is now having a diagnose. I love grandpa, and I don't want to see him become an empty shell who is impossible to have a normal conversation with. This is just taking me really hard, it wasn't so long ago that he was involved in an car accident(caused by him in a way that I would rather not mention), and I know all this is hard on mom and grandma.
There has been signs on it, lately when I've talked with him I gotta talk really slow and repeat myself or else he won't get it. He can sit for hours and just stare on the TV, but when you ask him if he's seen anything good, he has no idea.
He's very absent and I don't want it to become worse, I don't want to watch him float away, but I have no choice.

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I'm so sorry Xanahti :(
But I know what you're talking about, my granda got alzheimers for 2 years now. He doesn't remember me each time I visit him, neither does he remember his own children. Often, he just sit there for hours, staring at the wall...and without my grandma he'd be nothing, he isn't even able to go to toilet anymore. Well, some say he kinda deserved it, seeing what he did to my grandma but I still tend to have pity with him.
Well, there's nothing you can do, I'm sorry for having to say this, but it's true...:(
Still I hope it won't get that bad with your grandpa, stay strong :hugs:

We think my only gran is getting Altzimers too, so I empathise hun.

Life does these horrible things to us, but it makes us who we are. I shall definatly be hinking of you during this tough time darl.
:hugs:

Well... How do I explain this. I seem to go though mild 'loops' of feeling down and being happy. Sometimes I just want to cry and have no idea why. Usually in this phase I try to hide it the best I can. During my down phases I get upset over small, simple things. But, at other times I am just my 'normal self'. What ever that may be. And there is no distinct pattern to this. Should I just tell myself to grow up? Or, is this a matter that can worsen. I was partially not wanting to bother you guys with my personal problems. But, oh well, what can bringing it up hurt?

@ Lionloversam

I feel like that a lot too. Sometimes I feel that I need to cry, talk to somebody, but I just hide it thinking that "I don't want them to think I'm silly or depressed". I never feel I can talk bout everything with anybody, I gotta be cheerful and fun all of the time, or else I don't know if they'll like me anymore. It's quite silly thoughts, but I feel vunerable when people know I'm sad.
The feelings doesn't go away just because they're hidden in your mind. I would suggest talking to a friend or a psychologist. Talk about everything that has happend in your life, your worries and concerns. Talking is a way to work at your thoughts. Maybe you can figure out what makes you feel like this.

@ Lionloversam and Xanahti - I'm very sorry you two feel like this, if theres anything I can do to help please.. please email me or contact me via MSN (shadow_werewolf2@hotmail.com) :( I'm sorry I can't do more.
@ Lionloversam - take Xanahti's advice about talking to a friend or councillor or psychologist. This is the best option as talking always helps. I went through a terrible phase over Christmas and through talking to a few friends and especially my closest friend, I overcame it. Talking helps you a lot.

:hugs:
My thoughts are with you both.

Thank you.... I may try talking to a friend. I was thinking it may be a good idea to keep a note pad with me and write down what I may be thinking or whatever is on my mind at those times.... just a idea.... Maybe I can find a pattern... What do you think?

Thats quite a good idea! I hadn't thought of that!
Don't aim to specifically find a pattern though. Writing stuff down doesn't have to have a purpose other than simply making you feel better. ^_~
I used to write poetry (and pretty rubbish poetry too) when I felt down and even tho it was a load of crud, it helped.

It can take a lot of guts to share this to one of your friends, but you've told us! :D True, most of us only know you online and we don't see you in day to day situations.. but hey! We'e friends too! :p
You do what feels right. :)

I talked to my mom very breifly today and she recommended that I read a book called, "Telling yourself the truth." And she said she will talk to me more about it later. About MSN messenger, I don't think I have it.

I wish I didn't have emotions!

Why not hun?